Exploring the Connection Between Self and Love Our True Essence

For me, love was often described as a feeling for someone, an action, or a state of mind. Yet, when I asked myself, “What is love?” or “How do we love what we don’t know?” the answers become less clear. The journey to love, especially self-love, begins with understanding ourselves deeply. Without this understanding, love remains elusive, like chasing a shadow. This post explores how knowing our true essence can transform our relationship with ourselves and others, revealing love as not just an emotion but a fundamental part of being. This is like asking "How do we love, love?"

A quiet forest path symbolizing the journey to self-discovery and connection

Understanding the Self and Its Opposite

I've found to love ourselves, we must first understand what stands in the way: the self or ego. The ego is a construct we create to protect ourselves and to hide our true essence, which is love itself. This means the self and love are opposites. Without recognizing this opposition, we cannot truly know what we are or what love means.

For example, if we constantly seek approval from others, we are likely hiding our true self behind a mask of doubt and confusion. This behavior shows a disconnect from our essence. By exploring why we seek approval, we begin to uncover our motivations and fears. This process opens the door to genuine self-love because we start accepting ourselves beyond external validation.

The Paradox of Life and Self-Knowledge

I have also found, life itself is a paradox that reflects our inner conflict between the self and our true nature. When we understand this paradox, it can change how we live. Life challenges us to face our opposite—the ego—and through this awareness, we can rediscover what we truly are.

This realization for me was a turning point. It means that love is not something outside us to find but something we are at our core. Recognizing this shifts the focus from searching for love externally to embracing the love within.

Reconnecting with Our True Essence Through Feeling

Knowing our true essence is not found in thoughts or labels but in feelings and energy. This vibrational light energy connects us to everything and everyone. It is the universal thread that weaves through all existence and is the essence of what we are.

Think about a time when you felt deeply connected to nature or another person—perhaps during a quiet walk in the forest or a heartfelt conversation. That sense of unity is an expression of this vibrational energy. It reminds us that our being is felt, not thought.

I have found quieting the mind is essential to experience this connection. When was the last time you intentionally stopped thinking? Moments of silence allow the mind to translate the information carried in the energy, revealing insights about ourselves and our place in the world.

The Mind’s Self-Criticism and How we can Handle It

Something recently that I have discovered is that our mind often criticizes itself in an attempt to serve us better. This inner voice known as the “self-critic,” can feel harsh and personal, if we don't know what we are. For example, after making a mistake, you might hear thoughts like, “I’m so careless, I am so stupid," or “I hurt someone.” These are not personal attacks but the mind’s way of trying to improve its service to you.

Recognizing this can reduce self-judgment and taking these thoughts personally, seeing them as the mind’s effort to help itself and you. This awareness creates space for compassion toward your-self and lessens the grip of negative self-talk that can become habitual.

Practical Steps to Embrace Self-Love and True Essence

• Reflect on your motivations: When we notice behaviors like seeking approval, ask why. Understanding our motivations helps reveal our true self.

• Practice mindfulness: Spend time each day quieting our minds through meditation or deep breathing. This helps me connect with my feelings and energy.

• Notice self-critical thoughts: When the self-critic arises, pause and observe it without judgment. Reminding ourselves, this is the mind’s way of trying to help.

• Connect with nature: Spend time outdoors to experience the vibrational energy that connects all life. Notice how this affects our sense of essence and what we feel.

• Journal your experiences: Writing about our feelings and thoughts can clarify our understanding of our-self and our journey toward self-love.

  
  

Embracing the Journey

I have found that understanding and loving ourselves is not a destination but a journey in collaboration with our mind. It requires patience, curiosity, and kindness as we break down old programs. By recognizing the ego, mind and its role, then reconnecting with our true essence, and managing the mind’s self-criticism, we open the door to a deeper, more authentic love.

With love for you all

Daniel James Wilson

Author of: The Best Kept Secret Is"YOU"

A Journey Into The Rabbit Hole With Autism And Love